Buncha Savages in this Town (#52-54: Clerks.; Mallrats; Clerks II)

When I was 13 or so, my older brother came home with a couple of rental VHS tapes (ah, the bad ol' days of home entertainment): one was Clerks.; the other was Reservoir Dogs. These were the leading comedy and drama, respectively, of the early '90's independent film boom and we treated ourselves a double feature. Before then, I had never seen a movie that looked like something my friends and I could have put together on our own (could being the operative term). Afterwards, I was buzzed with excitement and never looked at movies the same way.

 

That night is one of the many, many acts of corruption which led to our gluttonous DVD collection and, consequently, this blog.

 

#52: Clerks.

 

^Not even supposed to be here today.

On that momentous night (probably because we watched Clerks. first), I didn't realize what a huge influence Quentin Tarantino's Reservoir Dogs had on writer/director/Silent Bob Kevin Smith: the interstitial title cards; the highly curated soundtrack; and even a camera-in-the-trunk shot. Of course, the most obvious similarity is that dialogue drives the action (such as it is) - and pop culture references don't just pepper the dialogue, it is the dialogue. Other than that, though, they couldn't be more different movies.

 

Clerks. is the classic example of writing what you know: famously shot in grainy black and white on  a budget of maxed out credit cards, it is filmed in and about the actual convenience store in which Smith worked. Brian O'Halloran plays Smith stand-in Dante Hicks, the carry out employee who isn't supposed to be at work but is and isn't supposed to be pining over his philandering ex-girlfriend (Lisa Spoonhauer as Caitlin Bree) but is. His best friend, Randal Graves (Jeff Anderson), "runs" the video store next to the carry out. Mainly, however, Randal, bothers Dante by debating Star Wars, borrowing his car to rent transgender porn from another video store, and generally antagonizing the idiotic patrons of the Quick Stop ("Do you sell hubcaps for a '68 Pinto hatchback? Oh! Mini-Trucker Magazine!"). Meanwhile, Jay (Jason Mewes) and Silent Bob (Smith) sell weed in front of the store...and Russian heavy metal.

 

 

I'm not sure any of the actors were professional actors before Clerks. (or, for that matter, after). It's not a master class, by any means. But O'Halloran's shaggy dog self-pity works perfectly against Anderson's aggressively disrespectful sarcasm. The dialogue is delivered with pretty exquisite timing, however, and that's no small thing. And the dialogue is worth the price of admission alone. It's as if Smith had been mentally cataloguing years of indignity and absurdity in the service industry (trust me, I've been there) and let it all gestate internally until it came out of him as one of the funniest scripts ever written. Granted, some of it worked better at 13 than now - but some things even a dead guy on a toilet would get excited about.  

 

A classic comedy we often turn to on days where a laugh is needed.*

   

FINAL VERDICT: KEEPER.

 

#53: Mallrats

 

Smith followed up Clerks. by largely sticking to the formula in Mallrats; once again it's a movie about two perpetually adolescent friends, their intensive discussions regarding very important topics (i.e., superhero genitalia), and their romantic travails.

 

The only tell that things had truly changed for Smith is the fanboy Stan Lee cameo rigged into the plot (and that he can now afford to shoot in color).

Before he was that guy in My Name is Earl (I can never remember what they called his character), Jason Lee was a pro-skateboarder. But once he opens his mouth as Brodie, the noncommittal comics-obsessive with a love of malls (both suburban and "dirt"), his fate as a comedic actor was sealed - he's outright hilarious. The film starts when Brodie's girlfriend, Rene (Shannen Doherty), tired of sneaking into Brodie's mom's basement only to watch him play NHL '94 on Sega Genesis, breaks up with him in a letter (which Brodie later frames). Meanwhile, Brodie's straitlaced best friend, T.S. (then-hot Jeremy London) is ditched by Claire Forlani (Brandi) who chooses to appear on her father's game show rather than going on their planned trip to Florida (where T.S. wants to propose on the Universal tour right before Jaws pops out of the water). The two console themselves with a trip to the mall - where it just so happens Brandi's dad's dating game show will be and Jay (Mewes) and Silent Bob (Smith) are eager to help tear that mother down.

The script for Mallrats is almost as good as that for Clerks. with a number of running jokes that actually run: the indefatigable quest of Willam (Ethan Suplee) to see a sailboat (or a schooner?) in a Magic Eye painting, poor Gwen (Joey Lauren Adams) not being able to try on clothes without Silent Bob crashing the party, and Shannon (Ben Affleck) liking to go somewhere very uncomfortable (like the back of a Volkswagen). Either inspired by the Marvel Universe or Tarantino's similar approach, it also becomes clear in Mallrats that Smith's characters are interconnected across films (the View Askewniverse, per the name of Smith's production company). Brandi has to go on the game show because the girl who died mid-back stroke in Clerks. was supposed to be the contestant. Even an apparent relative of Dante Hicks shows up, with Brian O'Halloran appearing as Gil Hicks, the befuddled Contestant No. 3.

Funny, fast-paced, and littered with comics references; a perfect pick-me-up comedy to pop in the DVD player at any time.

FINAL VERDICT: KEEPER

#54: Clerks II

Smith has made some good movies since the two discussed above (Dogma, Chasing Amy, Zack & Miri Make a Porno), some that are for fans only (Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back), some that have one good scene (Jersey Girl's Sweeney Todd sequence), one that is flat out terrible (Cop Out), and one we haven't seen (Red State). But the only other one we have in our collection is Clerks II, the sequel 12 years removed from the original. (Don't ask me where our copy of Dogma ran off to...I was looking forward to watching it for this...)

With the Quick Stop burned down, Dante (O'Halloran) and Randal (Anderson) pick up jobs at Mooby's - a hilariously terrible sounding fast food place which first made its View Askewniverse appearance in Dogma (I think). Joining them in the burger-flipping biz is Rosario Dawson as their boss, Becky, and Trevor Fehrman as the Transformers/LOTR obsessed Jesus freak, Elias. Of course, Jay (Mewes) and Silent Bob (Smith) have found a new place to deal as well.

Once again, Dante finds himself between two women - Dawson's Becky and his purported fiancee, Emma (Jennifer Schwalbach). Of course, it is ludicrous that these two women would have even a passing interest in a 33 year old assistant manager of a burger joint (which Randal is never slow to point out). But believability isn't the point of this movie. It's a reunion of old friends and all that entails. Its fun to see "where they are now"...even if some of the laughs are evoked by nostalgia for the first more than enjoyment of their retelling in the second. But there's plenty of new stuff that works as well - particularly Randal's mission to "take back" a certain racially charged term involving stoops and primates, which he misunderstood as meaning general laziness. Randal's merciless badgering of Elias for loving Go-Bots and Bilbo feels a bit dated but I'm old now, so who cares?

 

Smith's penchant for unnecessary broadness gets the better of him here (e.g. a crane shot dance sequence, which is supposed to be cornily charming, I guess). And there is also the extended donkey show sequence...which, almost despite itself,  does kind of work, mainly by upending expectations and upping the stakes. But really? Bestiality? Do we need a movie that dedicates 15 minutes of running time to a donkey show in a burger joint? [SCRATCHES CHIN, THINKS HARD].

This is better than 90% of comedy sequels and funny in its own right. But Kinky Kelly is a sticking point for Ms. ReViewing Habit (no pun intended) and I'm happy to live with the original.

FINAL VERDICT: PITCH IT

 

*Not to be too much of downer, but this is literally what we watched on the night of 9/11, when we couldn't take the news anymore. We still laughed.